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Sunday, November 28, 2010

The Christmas Goat and I share our Hit List

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I have a friend named Epione. I love her blog Translucent Journey because it has a creative, exploratory vibe that reminds me of the way I once felt about SL, before I got kind of tired and sad. I appreciate her friendship because she's cool with the fact that I'm not very chatty or SLocial. I've been booted from many friends lists because I don't talk much. It always stings, but I guess some people find the whole 'silent friend' thing annoying. But the fact that Epione is never in my face about how an SL friend should be is probably why we've been friends for such a long time and, unfortunately for her, she now knows almost every boring detail of my life.

Anyway, she told me about this African pigmy goat in the Neon Frog MM board yesterday. As soon as I got it, I slapped a Santa hat on it and turned it into a new SL Christmas tradition. Now I almost want somebody to swing by my yard and start something just so I can yell,

"BITCH, BACK UP OFF MY CHRISTMAS GOAT!"

(See, I'm laughing now. Welcome to the mind of a child trapped in a thirtyish-and-holding body.)

Moving on.

I love fur. I probably get it from my grandmother, who once had a closet full of it. She's not in great health now, but I'm pretty sure she could still take down an army of PETA activists with one swing of a 30-pounds-of-fur-clad arm. Do not touch her mink!

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(That is not a hair accessory. It's a big damn snowflake that happened to land on my head at that moment.)

This Furline Hoodie from A:S:S is sexy as hell and, at 75L, makes me feel giddy. I particularly like the fact that creator Photos Nikolaidis packs it with a notecard that says, "People! For the love of God, delete the resize scripts before you try to TP in this epically primmy thing!" (OK, actually he didn't use those exact words, and fortunately for him I don't write his notecards.)

That so-disgusting-it's-awesome Off With My Head Snowman is 100L at Post Mortem, the headquarters for all your dark and twisted holiday needs. It includes a dripping blood animation. Merry Christmas!

I'm dressed for battle because I'm going to try to finish something like 19 hunts in two days. I've deleted the resize scripts in every prim, slapped a Baiastice hairpiece on a tattoo hairbase and said "to hell with shoes." I'm starting with the Diamond is Mine Hunt because every prize (and link to each stop — THANK YOU!) is pictured HERE and I like a bunch of them. (Earthstones! LeeZu! Shiki! Mood!)

I like to help people, so here are the Websites I can't live without on these fueled-by-greed weekends:

For a list of current hunts, links to their blogs and, praise God, PICTURES of the prizes, I go here: SL-Schnaeppchen Freebs, Sales and More. There's a slight language barrier, but whatever. (What does schnaeppchen mean?) I also check out SL Freebie Hunters. Between the two of them, I can usually tell if a particular hunt has prizes that are humorous enough to inspire me to search for them. (Always looking for blog material.)

To get the scoop on some of the coolest Lucky Chair schwag, I go here: Lucky Kitty Crew.

— Even I, the Queen of Way Too Many Words, do not have enough of them to thank Penelope Thiessam and her crew over at The Rumor blog for traipsing around and taking photos, complete with oft-humorous commentary and location links, of almost EVERY sale item in 50 Linden Fridays, Super Bargain Saturdays, Saturday Night Fever, Project Themeory, Stumblebum, Humpday Happiness, Lazy Sunday, TOSL, Thirsty Thursday, The Dressing Room, and certain hunts, sales and events. My God, they're INSANE over there! I'd offer to help them, but I'm too damn lazy. I can write a glowing paragraph about them, though. Here, watch it glow: *glow glow glow glow glow*

— There are so many stores in 60L Weekends, I used to not even go there. The three-notecard list of participants is exhausting, even though I appreciate the widespread generosity it illustrates. Fortunately, there's a Flickr page of all the sale items here: Official 60L Photos. It's refreshed every weekend so the photos are always current. Even the vast quantity of photos is a lot to digest, but I always at least check out Altya's Dream Creations, Primalot, A&M MOCAP Studios, Dare, DV8, Snowpaw Fashions, Ear Candy and a few others.

OK, time to wrap up this post. The photos were shot in this really wonderful Christmasy location called my yard.

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Awwwwww yeah, baby! I like the fact that my festive gingerbread house (825L) by MB-CreationZ is bigger than my snowy cottage (1500L) by Reek (both purchased on Marketplace). Oops!

Frankly, it's not enough holiday yard decor for me, but I have 20 prims left in my prim allowance. So, um, there's no furniture in those houses. Well, except for —

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BUNNY!

If you're jealous of my Christmas Goat, today's Neon Frog MM board offering is a hog. (Rock.) I'm always surprised to get the "What's an MM board?" question, but it happens often. MM is short for Midnight Mania. Each MM board has a target number on it. If that many people touch ("slap") the board, everyone wins the featured prize, which is delivered at midnight. Good times, yes?

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Please, please, please go slap the Neon Frog board today because I NEED THIS HOG! You need it too. Yes you do! And show some love in return for the great MM board freebs by checking out the rest of the store. The animals come in trans-perm versions so consider them for stocking stuffers this year. Big stockings. (Dear Neon Frog, please make a unicorn. Love, Emerald.)

YOU WANT A PIECE OF THIS?
Neon Frog
A:S:S
Post Mortem (check out the MM boards while you're there; they're usually pretty cool)
My Yard, photo shoot appointments available on request
MB-CreationZ Mainstore and on Marketplace
Reek inworld and on Marketplace
** Poses (except for the last pic) are from the A Fairytale set by .Tea, eight poses for 75L this weekend for Project Themeory

Have fun today! ♥

Friday, November 26, 2010

As we walk in fields of . . . goldenrod :-/

OK, let's knock out this goldenrod post because I've kind of decided I hate this color.

Here we go:

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Custom GOLDEN unicorn 7Seas fishing ROD by *KK* Custom Creations (148L).

I bought it because the picture made me laugh, but I have now decided that it's 100% pure awesome. It makes me want to fish again. Get it on Marketplace HERE.  Or, visit creator Kabalyero Kidd's store 3 Stars and a Sun inworld HERE. That store has many more hilarious custom fishing rods as well as some pretty cool stuff and funny shirts ("In memory of Emerald Viewer" and "I'm not an ALT, promise :-)" to name a couple that made me chortle).

Chortle!

And that was my very lame attempt at goldenrod humor.

Just when I promised I wasn't going to do the Marketplace search thing anymore, Luna hits us with a color like GOLDENROD in her 52 Weeks of Color Challenge. Woo. I guess that's why we call it a challenge. I searched my inventory and only found some flippy floppys and an ancient freebie Lelutka bag. I considered a nude shot with just those two things but decided it would be kind of awkward.

The goldenrod pickings on Marketplace are slightly slim. (No, really?) There's a fab Kouse's Sanctum gown, but I noticed another gown by a creator that's new to me and decided to give it a try.

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I like the detailing. This outfit needed a delicate silver drop chain down the back and it would have been perfect. Unfortunately many of my favorite jewelry pieces are now partly or completely INVISIBLE — EarthStones and Alchemy Immortalis rings and necklaces, to name two — with the V2.3 viewer. (Hell yes, it's tragic and it merits a sentence in bold.) One friend thinks it might be a microprim issue. Whatever it is, it makes me sad.

My pictures also aren't as sharp anymore, even with High-Res Snapshots turned on. Case in point:

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Ugh. It looks like I barely have a face. [insert an irritated sigh and eyeroll here] I kind of gave up after this picture. It's the best I've got of the front. Sorry.

*end today's V2.3 bitching*

Dress: G&T Creations Butterfly Gown Papillon in Goldenrod (650L) on Marketplace HERE. It has a pretty shoulder piece that must have fallen off while I was trying to accessorize. It also includes pretty gloves. I'm not sure why I didn't put them on. This post is fail.

Hair: Annie in Almond by Truth. Poses: from Glitterati's Model series. The lush flowery photo location is Wanderstill at Ode.

                                           AND NOW, NEWS YOU CAN USE

Just in time for your life-sized nativity sets — because I know you all have one — Neon Frog has a donkey in its MM board this weekend.

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"Hello, Gentlemen. Look at your woman. Now back to me. Now back at your woman. Now back to me. Sadly, she isn't me. Blahblahblah. I'm on a donkey."

This board locked down yesterday. It probably will today. So go slap it!

UPDATE!!! NO! It's an armadillo on the board now! It'll still look good in your life-sized Christmas Nativity scene though. And oooooof, this is turning out to be the Murphy's Law blog post from hell. Seriously. I need to change the title to "just about everything in this post is wrong and/or sucks."

Shoes: Patent Leather Pumps in Goldenrod (175L), by Jeanette's Joint. I really like them — this shot doesn't do them justice. Get them HERE on Marketplace or HERE inworld. There are 88 color options. Yes, I said 88. So if you too are sick of goldenrod, creator Jeanette Doobie can hook you up with a color that doesn't look like the inside of a newborn's dirty diaper. (Sorry — I hope nobody was eating. And you know I love you, Luna! ♥)

Jeanette's Joint also has some avatar effects that kind of delight me. Like a set of flaming eyes, flaming hands, a flaming halo and a flaming mouth. And horns. And a tail. For a mere 40L. Check it.

I'm tired. I'm blue. I need coffee. This is one of those days when I'll just end this post (and the crowd screams, "THANK GOD") with -

THE END

Saturday, November 20, 2010

Big Pimpin'

Oops. I'm already behind in Luna Jubilee's 52 Weeks of Color Challenge.

Last week's color: PIMP

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I mean blue.

And pimp.

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I promise not to use this cheap blog gimmick for every color. (I like the five-star-rated Pimp Leprechaun Male Neko.)

I used to start my days drinking coffee, browsing world news headlines and repeating inspirational and motivational affirmations. Now I chase a couple of Xanax with some grapefruit juice and screw around on XStreet. I mean Marketplace. The possibilities for fun are SO ENDLESS there, I can't resist. It's like a hobby now. Or an obsession.

SPENDIN' G's
Trench Pimp in Big Money Blu by NiCHe Fur Inc. ("Making Your Second Life Sexy and Luxurious!") (100L)
Pimp Hat w Fur in Blue Zebra Stripe (99L)
L.Fauna 2.0 Lipstick - Blue Fatpack (60L) ("Is that blue lipstick you're wearing or did you just finish having steamy oral Smurf sex?")

I wish I could be the SL Marketplace spokesmodel.

Not bought on Marketplace: Stiletto Moody Tall Boot in Navy Blue Patent; Annie hair in Smurf by Truth; Pose: Feeling Blah 3 by !BANG

I also bought these eyes out of morbid fascination, only to realize that I actually think they're kind of cool:

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Amacci/InSight Glamour Blue Eyes w/Diamonds, yo (200L). Three different styles are included, as well as a prim sparkle. I'm not wearing the prim sparkle because the V2.3 update has completely screwed up my lighting to the point where I have absolutely no concept of what I really look like, lighting-wise. Thank you, Ali Chenaux, for voicing your opinions on this topic. I wanted to, but I'm too damn lazy. (Skin: Sophie in Smoky by Mynerva)

This particular color theme was pretty appropriate since I'm blue about several things ATM:

1. The death of my Nicole Kidman fairy

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I logged in this week and she was just . . . gone. That's her cage. That's her fruit. She, however, must have perished somehow. I left the breedable fairies group some time ago because of all the complaining and drama there. Plus, I could never get my fairies to copulate. Fixing this problem required buying an aphrodisiac and frankly I'd rather buy shoes. Now I don't even know if they're still making breedable fairies. I used to have five. One by one, they vanished, but the one in black held on . . . until now.

But yeah, they all bore an uncanny resemblance to Nicole Kidman:

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2. I look like a bloated, spray-tanned hooker in League's new Amber skin.

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I charge 500L for 15 minutes of steamy oral Smurf sex.

I'm a huge fan of League's skins, and almost everyone else looks fabulous in this one. So blame my wonkered-out shape.

3. Here's what My Friends list looks like these days:

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So for God's sake, please don't change your profile pictures any time soon.

[P.S. Are there any HTML geniuses out there who can give me a code to reduce the Grand Canyon-sized spacing between my paragraphs? Irritating me. These posts could be so much shorter-looking.]

Thursday, November 11, 2010

That's the Truth, Ruth

Hey look, everybody! New Truth hair!

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You know, sometimes bloggers go to great and justified lengths (pardon the pun) to showcase Truth Hawks' new releases. You've seen it: We get all gussied up and do the fangirl slam dance all over the feeds.

But maybe we're taking the wrong approach. Maybe we need to tone everything else down and just let the beauty of the hair speak for itself!

So rock that Mischa hair, Ruth, you sexy bitch!

Kidding. :-\

Actually I logged in this morning to find myself transformed into that annoying noob chick in the peppy Pepto-Bismol dress.

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Oh my gahhhhhhd. Get her away from me.

(Hair: Cady in Streaked, um, Swedish, I think. I was too damn depressed to write it down.)

Dear Linden Lab, if you're going to Ruth me, I'd rather we just kick it old-school with the stuff-that-nightmares-are-made-of Ruth.

Because this chick annoys the bejeezus out of me.

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(Hair: Kitty in, hell I don't know, Auburn? You can change the type of metal on the clip, which is cool.)

She's got that smug "Ha ha ha! It's going to take you at least 30 minutes to get your AV back to normal! Ha ha ha! Good luck finding all that stuff in your inventory! Ha! Ha! Ha! . . . Ha!" look on her face.

She's practically begging for a good old-fashioned ass-kicking. (Does she even have a name?)

I'll take mullet-master Ruth and her startled "Who are you and what am I doing here and why aren't I teaching a girls' gym class somewhere?"gaze over this polka-dotted bitch any day:

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(Hair: Mischa in ... awkward pause . . . Almond? Your guess is as good as mine.)

Truth also released a new men's style today.

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David in MahoganychestnutbrownishIhavenoidea

As highly irritated as I am right now, I'm kind of inspired to start a series of old-school Ruth fashion posts. Or maybe 'The Chronicles of Ruth's Second Life Adventures.' Take her to strip clubs and such. Get her pole dancing. Crash SLebrity parties. Ruth goes ballroom dancing. The possibilities are endless!

Now I'm laughing. Don't steal that idea!

SEE THE HAIR ON BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE
Truth Hawks' Blog

GET THE HAIR FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL SELF
Truth In World
Truth on SL Marketplace

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

If I knew Picasso, I would buy myself a grey guitar and play

Let's take a break from cleaning out my inventory . . .

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. . . and mix Luna Jubilee's 52 Weeks of Color blog challenge with my favorite game, "What the Hell is That Thing on XStreet?"

Except I guess it's "SL Marketplace" now. That doesn't have the same ring, but whatever.

Ready? First we'll put this week's color (grey) in Search and spin the wheel:

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(That guy kind of looks like Adam Lambert!)

There's only one rule: You must pick something from the first page that pops up.

Actually I'll add a second rule: It must cost 100L or less. I don't know about you, but I'm pretty broke these days.

"Go!"

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Stellar's Timeless Knit Dress in Grey for 50L = Score!

Designer Lexi Morgan of Stellar is one of the kindest people I've met in Second Life. I don't even have the words to convey how extraordinary I think she is. I'm glad her fun dress found its way into my Really Lame Attempt at a Blog Post.

That grey dress is a Marketplace-only special, not available in world. Other colors are available for 300L each.

We need shoes. Spin the wheel of Marketplace fate again:

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Nifty. I stomped on your hearts and strapped them to my boot! For only 49L. Gimme!

One final quest for accessories:

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Why so serious, Epoque models? You're wearing Big Damn Bows strapped to your heads, for God's sake. (LOL at that guy's face.)

These screenshots are getting kind of old. Let's hit the catwalk:

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My face looks really stupid in that picture, like I'm trying not to wipe out.

(Socks by Miel; Nina hair in Raven by Truth; Sophie skin in Smokey by Mynerva)

"You know, grey's my favorite color. I felt so symbolic yesterday. If I knew Picasso, I would buy myself a grey guitar and play."

Am I the only one who got stuck on "Mr. Jones" by Counting Crows while working on this grey post? (Probably.) I used to love that song until my youngest brother told me it's really about masturbation. That *bleep*hole. Whether it is or not, he's totally ruined it for me now. Nasty.

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I've decided the boots are a really cute deal for 49L. They're also available in other colors. I prefer a more substantial heel, but I guess you need those spikes to capture hearts and shove them in your legwarmers.

Oh, and I also found this free Funny Bow necklace in grey by Just Me. I'm so impressed because it even comes with its own shadow in three layers. SO IMPRESSED — I want all my jewelry to cast shadows now.

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Eyegasm. Those Cauldron Grey eyes by Daydream Eyes are only 10L and they now live with A:S:S and BCD in my Most Awesome Eyes Ever inventory folder. I bought 16 other colors by Daydream — all for 10L each — and they're all stunning. I can tell that a lot of love and thought went into the making of them. I'm perceptive like that.

Too . . . much . . . pretty . . . making . . . me . . . nauseous . . . must . . . do something . . .

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STOP! Hammer time!

Sorry. I couldn't resist those pants. Or the ARC of 95,000 that comes with them.

(Grey Glow Baggies outfit by Underworld Designs, special promo price of 50L; usually 275L. Pose from the Fight Me set by Diesel Works. Hime hair in Charcoal by [the oBscene]. Flower Power face tattoo by Little Pricks.)

Now it's time for a tedious list of links to all this stuff.

Everything in this post (except skin, hair, poses and face tattoo) was purchased on Second Life Marketplace and chosen by the Hand of Fate.

BUY YOUR OWN
Timeless Knit Dress in Grey by Stellar (50L)
LucieGrey Suede Boots by MIA Island (49L)
Overstated Bow in Grey by Epoque (FREE)
Funny Bow necklace in Grey by Just Me (FREE)
Cauldron Grey Eyes by Daydream (10L)
Grey Glow Baggies Outfit by Underworld Designs (50L)
Join the 52 Weeks of Color Challenge HERE

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Hey, what're you doing tonight?

I love this dress so fiercely, it's going in my "Damn, I Love These Clothes So Much that If SL Ever Eats Them, I'll Be Holding a Public Funeral for Them" folder.

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I paid 100L for it today. That's right! A mere 100L. Hell, I have that in my back pocket. So do you! Yes you do! Check the jeans in your washing machine. That's where I usually find my lost money.

Let's look at it in all its glory:

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Twilight Princess gown in Ophelia by LVS & Co. Miranda Hair in Auburn by Truth.

Wow! And yep, there comes a time in everyone's life when we have to admit defeat and say, "To hell with poses. I'm just gonna levitate over the ocean and snap the damn picture."

I've always loved the gowns at LvS & Co., so I got mixed emotions when I logged in to this sad-news notecard this weekend:

"Hello everyone.
This is October, Ravenlynn's assistant. She gave me the OK to log in for her and do an emergency markdown today. As you know she's been sick for a few weeks now, and unfortunally the last doctor visit and meds just weren't enough to kick this flu she has. So she's hopefully going to see the doctor Monday. But because of financial hardships, we are having to do an emergency markdown of the store for her doctor's bill. The entire store is marked down to 100L. Children's wear is 99L. The markdown will only run until Monday, when Raven is hopefully able to make her appointment.
Thank you for your continued support during these hard times.
October Fall, LVS & Co"

This kind of news always causes a moral dilemma for me. Part of me wants to scream, "WOO HOO! All those fabulous gowns for 100L!!!" . . . and then my heart hurts because the sale is the result of a bad RL situation. My own family is crumbling under the weight of medical bills at the moment, so if I were a designer, I'd probably be doing the same thing right now.

I try to take comfort in the fact that my shopping spree at LVS & Co. today hopefully helped a little. Yours can too, if you feel so inclined!

So check out my haul, y'all! (FYI: All gowns in this post are available in several colors.)

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Victorian Dress in Tears; Tara (streaked) hair in Crow by Truth

This dress has three top options: corset only (that means all your glorious boobage is on full display), corset with bra, and corset with top, which is what I'm wearing in these pics.

I love the details Ravenlynn puts into her work:

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My butt is ruffly and ready to party.

I also love her 7 Deadly Sins collection. My favorite is Sloth, mainly because if you look up that word in a dictionary, you'll see a picture of my face.

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7 Deadly Sins in Sloth; Breathe Me hair by Shag

Oh, you want to see the rear view too? OK!

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Baby got back.

If big foofy gowns aren't your thing, you can meander across the garden path to The Dollhouse, Ravenlynn's Dollie dress shop. Everything there is 100L or less all the time, no medical emergencies necessary.

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Lil Zombie; Cleo hair in Night by Truth

I know a lot of you are sick of zombies, but I've loved them even before they became mainstream — just ask my $150 Limited-Edition "Dawn of the Dead" box set and 93 zombie movies. As such, I'm lovin' the details on this dress:

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They're coming to get you, Barbaraaaaaaaaa!

You still have several hours to stock up on gorgeous LVS & Co. gowns for 100L each — even in the bridal section. (Yes, I bought a wedding dress. I probably won't use it, but I couldn't resist it at that price.) And who knows? Maybe the sale will be extended through Monday.

LVS stands for "Liquid Velvet Studios," by the way. *checks another name off the "Stores Whose Names I Don't Understand" list*

VISIT IN WORLD
LVS & Co
The Dollhouse